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How do we know when we're ready to have another baby?
~ A message board archive

For those of you who planned your pregnancies . . . How did you decide when you were ready to have another baby? Did you have a specific time frame in mind? Did you suddenly just know? Share your thoughts with us on the timing of your subsequent babies.

From ElizabethJ ~ I started getting the bug the closer Gabe got to turning 1. My husband wasn't convinced he wanted another baby at all. I wanted them close together (my sister and I are 15 months apart). I figured I already had all the baby stuff and I was used to getting by on little sleep at times. I'm glad my babies are 2 years apart. Gabe has been wonderful with Ella and I think they are going to be close to each other as they grow up, which is what I wanted. My husband and his sister are 9 years apart in age, and they have nothing in common with each other and he feels more like a parent to her than a sibling.

From an_010 ~ We just waited until it "felt" right. For me it meant that I had lost all the baby weight from baby #1, and she was in a good routine. I think for me it also had something to do with age as I was approaching 35 and didn't want to wait too much longer after that to have another baby. I also liked the idea of a 3 year age difference - again, it just felt right. I had to do a little talking to get my husband interested. He, of course, wasn't feeling the pressure of my "advanced maternal age".

From PaulaSue ~ For me it was two things. I was 25 when we married and I knew I wanted to get my baby making done before I was 35 since that is when my Mom was diagnosed with breast cancer. When my first was about to turn 1, I started to get those urges and then again with my second. Also both my husband and I are only children and we wanted to have two or more and wanted them close in age and hopefully close friends forever. His friend has a younger brother, 8 years, and they are not close at all as children or grown-up.

From Tami C ~ I always knew I wanted more than one child. About the time I was ready for a second baby the relationship with my son's father was over, so I thought maybe I was finished. Then I met and married my husband, and we knew from the start we would want children together. As soon as our daughter was born we knew we wanted to try to conceive again right away. Patti was 10 months old when I got pregnant with Abigail. We were thrilled because we have older children and now these two younger ones will have a close-age sib to grow up with.

From ink-stained mom ~ With my daughter, I was feeling the tick-tock of 40 approaching. I was 38 and my son was about 18 months when I talked to my husband about trying again -- I had wanted to make sure my son had had a good run with breastfeeding, since I didn't know whether he would be able to nurse throughout my entire pregnancy. It had taken 9 months to conceive him, so I didn't want to let a lot of time pass again before we started trying. Ironically, we conceived my daughter about six weeks after we started trying. I had put off starting because I wanted to make sure I could travel by plane to my parents' anniversary -- Glad I did, because I was about 24 weeks along when we went!

From LoveMyAlexa ~ When my daughter turned 1, I felt I wanted another. I am an only child and I wanted her to have another child to play with, so when she was almost 2, I conceived my son. Now he's 1 and I'm wanting another! I just love pregnancy and babies!

From davismommy ~ With us we always knew we wanted at least two. In our case we actually delayed trying for #2 until we finished a major remodel on our house. Our kids are right about 2 1/2 years apart.

From phishy ~ I'm done breastfeeding #1, and I knew I was NOT going to have another summer baby here in California!

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From summergirl ~ When my husband and I decided we were ready to have kids we knew that what we meant were kids--two, one after the other. So that's what we did. I had my first daughter and nursed her for nine months. When she weaned I started getting cycles again and we just let things happen. I conceived #2 on my second cycle but miscarried. Third cycle after that we conceived again and had our second daughter. The two girls are almost exactly two years apart.

What happens now is up in the air. We don't know if there is a third child in our future. What we have decided is to wait until our second daughter is three to decide whether we are done or want one more. At that point I will be 38. By the time I'm 40 our family is what it is and we're done for good.

From baseballmom ~ My boys are 19 months apart. It took me 8 1/2 years and 4 losses to get my oldest and we felt if it was going to take that long again, we shouldn't waste any time. My boys are teenagers now and BEST friends. They do everything together and that's amazing for high school siblings. So to those experts who say you should wait the requisite 3+ years, big raspberries! The first year with a toddler and sick newborn were hard but it was so worth it to see how close my guys are now. The best spacing is what works for your family!

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