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Pros and Cons of Preschool
~ a message board archive
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From Susan Michelle ~ DH and I said that we would never send our children to a preschool because I was a SAHM and there wouldn't be a need to. After we had our DD we started to change our minds and went back and forth for a while on the pros and cons. It's such a hard decision that we discussed many times. Are your children in preschool? Did you wrestle with the idea of sending them or was it a clear cut decision for you?

In our case, preschool was right for our DD. Although we have friends and playdates, they weren't on a consistent basis. She needed more interaction than she was getting with other children so that's one of the main reasons for sending her. She's almost three and there are days that she doesn't want to listen and/or she tries to ignore the teacher but, all in all, she's learning so much from being with other adults, children, etc. I'm glad we sent her. I miss her so much when she's gone. I can't imagine what I'm going to be like when she goes to Kindergarten.

I'm not sure what we will do with DS (he's only 10 months old). When he's two (almost three) she'll be around so he will have someone to interact with. I guess we'll make that decision when it's time and see where he is and how's he's doing. KWIM?

I think that it's different for each family and child. What are your opinions/thoughts?

From DebbieL ~ My older DD went to pre-school for one year only when she was 4. I will send Kristen at 4 as well.

From CHERific ~ My oldest went to pre-school the year before Kindergarten (last year). I knew I wanted to give him a one year head start so he could get used to not being near me 24/7; he was always a clingy child. I'm not sure if it made a difference. I think it did but then again, he may have been more secure at this age regardless.

My youngest is 3 and has always been very independent. All last year taking Caleb to pre-school he always wanted to stay. He was also speech delayed. So for those 2 reasons, I enrolled him a year earlier than I normally would have (the year before Kindergarten) for 2 days a week, because he loved it and I knew it would help his speech and it has. He loves it. Now he's learning when Thursday comes because every morning taking Caleb to school he asked if he was going to school. Now he's starting to say "On Thursday"; it's so cute.

As far as cons go, he is picking up a lil' attitude from this one child that is from another country, has only been here for a few months. I don't think that is why he has behavior issues though; his mom doesn't correct him around other children. One morning he told me my ds was stupid, right in front of her. She said NOTHING! I told him that my son is NOT stupid and he is NOT nice to say such things! So it's just making my job harder because Ethan is pushing those boundaries and I've just got to push harder back.

From Lady Eo ~ I was working up until this year so my dd went to a daycare that was developmentally organized, if that makes sense. They worked on age-appropriate things and taught letters and numbers and colors and shapes and such.

If I am still at home when it is time for ds to go, I think we will send him. It did wonders for my dd socially-she relished the experiences.

I think it is good for us but I don't think it's a necessary prerequisite for school at all.

From MamaJAM ~ Since I'm a SAHM - we decided that one year of preschool is a good idea for our kids.

My 2 older DDs went to a 2 1/2 hour program 2 days per week the year before they started Kindergarten. That worked well for us. DD#3 is in the Pre-Kindergarten program this year at the same school my older girls attend. She's at school M-F from 8:30am-2:00pm. She's a very energetic child and needed more 'structure' (in our opinions) - which is why she's in such a long program this year. Next year she'll be in Kindergarten at the same school - M-F from 7:50am-3:30pm. (The school has Pre-K through 8th grade.)

Our boys are likely going to be in the Pre-Kindergarten program at the same school the year before they start Kindergarten unless we feel a shorter program is better for them at the time (we'll have to see what their personalities are as they get older).

From Mom2amy ~ I love having Amy in pre-school. She is learning and making friends. The only bad part is the colds, and I miss her when I am at school.

From catkrazy99 ~ I'm considering sending my child when she is 4. I'll most likely start her in January through June and have her stop for the summer and then start school in September. I think preschool at age 2 is just way too young. For now, we do mommy and baby activities (like gymboree).

From 2bighogs ~ We are putting Kieran in preschool when she is 4 (almost 5) to get her accustomed to being away at school before kindergarten. It will probably only be 2-3 half days per week~I guess we'll see what is working best when the time comes.

From PattiS ~ I taught pre-k for ten years and I can honestly say it depends on the age and needs of the child. We screened our children to determine if they needed intervention in all development and social aspects. You as a parent know in your gut what's best for them; their personalities and all that. Some don't need it, others it does wonders. We started taking three year olds for our five day a week 1/2 a day program and it's just too young. Most were still babies and needed another year home with mommy. Potty training was a huge issue. For three year olds a place to go with parents is better I think, it's too stressful at that age. When they are four or five going on to kindergarten the following year, it's a good thing, the adjustment is easier.

From SunGoddess ~ I would like to send my daughter to preschool, but we just don't have the money for it and I have to drive my husband to and from work,so my life revolves around that. I have checked into some and most have long waiting lists,and I barely have the money to live, so preschool is out until her father gets a driver's license and we can get another car, and I can go to work and afford to send her to preschool.

From PattiS ~ Some public schools have preschool and it's free and it includes transportation, might want to check into that.

From Susan Michelle ~ Just wanted to add that my DD only goes twice a week, 2 1/2 hours each day. The preschool our DD goes to is at a local church and doesn't cost that much money but they are wonderful! I really looked into the program before letting her go.

We looked into Gymboree but couldn't afford the cost, plus, you have to have an adult with the child (at least the programs I looked into) and I didn't have anyone to watch my DS while I would be attending the class with DD.

I agree with PattiS, it's different for each child. As I stated before, I'm not sure what we will do when our DS is older, because he will have is big sis to play with.

From SharonCC ~ My daughter attends a montessori school 5 mornings a week . . . as a teacher myself I couldn't fathom NOT doing it. She's a very shy child but she loves this SO much. At first we started with 4 mornings a week but on the day she didn't go, she cried because she wanted to go to school. She's made friends, *loves* her teachers, has established routine, can interact in a classroom setting, is involved in a "community," and academically she has totally blossomed - in just a month she knows all her letters, is working on the sounds, can identify values of numbers, and knows things like the names of all the 7 continents and what vegetables are root vegetables.

At home she really just ran errands with me or watched TV, maybe attended dance or playgroup. Now she does that stuff in the afternoons and the mornings are much more enriching. The "interaction" she gets at places like dance and playgroup doesn't really compare to what she gets at school. It's so much more than that.

From cdw ~ We did toddle time last year (1 hour/week with the moms too) and now are in 3 year olds 2 hours/day twice a week. The pro is getting my twins to play with other kids and the 2 hours i have for myself. The con is the $ for 2 on a 1 income budget. They absolutely love going to school and I have made new friends also.

From Allie ~ My oldest dd goes to preschool; she is 3 and 1/2. She will go for one more year and then kindergarten.

My dh didn't support it at first because I am a sahm and he thinks that is enough stimulation/learning for her. I think preschool is good for both her and me - I need a break and she gets to be around other kids her age and she is learning how to socialize, get along with others and follow directions. Plus, it's fun for her!

From franros ~ My DD is only five months now, but I know that I will start pre-school with her when she is about two. We belong to the local Jewish Community Center and we already participate in some mommy and me activities there. There are some other mommies with babies her age and we are all getting to know one another, so when the time comes I think she will be excited about going to school with her friends. As she gets older she will get to know the other kids and I think the activities and socialization will be good for her and I think that time to work out or run errands alone is good for Mom as well. At first it will only be a couple of hours a day, two or three days a week. Right now she goes to the school's "short stop" babysitting for an hour, twice a week, so that I have the opportunity to work out. (I am trying to lose a lot of weight and get in shape so that I can keep up with her when she starts to run around!) I am always in the same building if she needs me. My parents sent me to preschool when I was 4 and I loved it.

From AZTanya ~ I am undecided about this. I am leaning towards letting her go to preschool after she turns 4 (which thankfully is a while away!) but another part of me really has been considering homeschooling. If I decide to homeschool I probably would not send her to preschool. I think a lot will depend on what I feel is best for my dd, and I'm still figuring that out as a first time mom.

From susi8573 ~ My husband works so much, sometimes even the weekends, so without pre-school I would go nuts. My son attends 5 days a week from 8:30-12:30 and dd goes into toddler-class twice a week. I enjoy the break and would go crazy without it

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