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Anne's Pregnancy Journal

21 weeks 4 days
~ A week away and home to the hormones!

Well. If I didnít believe that pregnancy messes with your hormones and emotions before, I surely do now!

I arrived home today after having spent a week away, much of the time spent at the annual convention of the National Guild of Hypnotists (which is always a lot of fun for me). On the way to the convention, Beth and I stopped off to see my friend Nancy, who is a midwife in Needham, Massachusetts. What a great way to spend a couple of days! Nancy is a strong homebirth advocate. In a world where my birth choices are frequently questioned or even ridiculed, I was blessed with two days is an oasis of calm, loving, and even passionate support for my right to choose my place and manner of birthing.

Of course, I got great advice while I was there, too. The morning I awoke at Nancyís was the only morning I have ever had any swelling. She immediately shoved a big glass of water and some cucumbers at me, telling me to eat cucumbers, watermelon, blueberries, and asparagus to keep from swelling. I donít know that I could follow her advice to eat 2 cucumbers every day for very long, but I can tell you, it sure works! She showed us a beautiful video she had recently acquired of a planned, unassisted homebirth of twins. (Now I may be a homebirth advocate, but I donít know if even I would do twins unassisted.) The great thing about this video was that we got to see a woman birthing without any interference, just her and her instincts, and it was phenomenal.

That was the start of my week away. From Nancyís we proceeded to Marlborough, MA for the convention, where I found myself paring down my schedule quite a bit. Typically, there are workshop sessions every hour from 8 am until at least 6 pm, and sometimes into the evening as well. I always have to plan one or two ďoffĒ sessions during the day in order to get lunch and whatnot. Saturday I got up early early to go to an 8 am workshop -- well, I didnít make it. Even though I got up at 6:30 (plenty of time for me usually), I just could not seem to get my rear in gear! I resolved to go to a 9am, and by that time, I was back in bed. I donít know why I was so exhausted, but I was. I thought Iíd just nap for an hour or so, then go down to the next one. I woke when my tummy told me it was time for lunch. Wow. Ok. Different pace of life, this pregnant thing!

Backtracking a little for a bit of hornblowing, for the second year in a row, Delaware Hypnosis Partners (I would be half of that) received the 7th Path Achievement Award from Banyan Hypnosis Center. Beth and I have been privileged to teach a wonderful self-hypnosis curriculum developed by Cal Banyan, and apparently, weíve exercised that privilege more than anyone else! We find it to be a centering practice in our own lives, and our clients have felt the same. This is the only award that had a repeat recipient, so now weíre motivated to go for number three! Of course, maternity leave ups the challenge, but hey, weíre go-getters, right?

Iíd say that award was the highlight of the convention for me. Running a close second is the looks on old friends and colleagues faces when they realized I hadnít been hitting the Twinkies -- thereís a BABY in there! So cool. I havenít figured out exactly how Iíll do the convention next August with an 7-8 month old, but Iím sure Matt can help me figure that out (right, honey?)

Enough about the convention. After a couple of days to stop off at my dadís in PA on the way home, I finally returned to my abode. As I pulled in the driveway, I started to get very excited. Matt, his mom, and his dad (who are both married to other people now) worked their buns off while I was away to get the babyís room painted, bathroom, and hallway painted, so I could avoid the fumes. I could not wait to see the results!

This is where the hormones come in, by the way. . .

I walked in the front door, and the first thing I saw were what looked like paint drips on the oriental rug Mattís mom, Penny, had passed on to us when we got our house. I started to cry and hyperventilate a bit. As I turned left up the stairs, I saw more drips on the hardwood floor in the hallway. When I looked into the babyís room, I saw even MORE drips on the hardwood, and then, I turned into the bathroom, mostly because I had to pee, turned around and sat on the toilet, and saw the bathroom paint. Blobs and smears of it on the tile floor, and a look where the wall met the backsplash at the sink as though a child had come along to finger-paint the edge. At this point, I am beyond reason.

I am peeing, crying, hyperventilating, and having an anxiety attack. A t this point, the baby starts kicking profusely, which makes me feel guilty (figuring itís probably because Iím so very upset) and I cry even harder. And Penny (remember, my mother-in-love) is due to come over in an hour or two. I call Matt on the phone, hoping for a reality check. He is as compassionate as possible, given that he busted his butt all weekend to get this done, and all I seem to see are problems (the paint job itself is actually fine.) He had tried earlier to tell me there was still cleanup to do, but this was definitely not what I had envisioned when he said that!

Eventually, I returned to myself and got some perspective. The oriental rug was fine -- they werenít paint drips, they were just something on the surface, which brushed off easily. The hardwood floors will clean up with some scrubbing. And, the uneven line at the backsplash couldnít be helped. We hadnít realized that previous owners of the house had used unpaintable caulk there, so it was going to be a problem no matter what. We evened it out the best we could, and at some point will either re-caulk, or just slap some molding up to hide it.

So, it all worked out in the end. But I still should have stock in a tissue company!

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