I hope this week was a good one for you all. I finally met with my dietician and the RN that works for the diabetes organization I ended up having to meet with. I was really nervous about my appointment. I knew they were going to ask me lots of questions about my diet and eating habits, but I wasn't sure what all to expect since it was a two hour appointment. That sounds a little long to me. I was completely all right with meeting with just a dietician to go over healthy eating choices and the best way for me to eat for the baby, and me but I just did not understand why I had to meet with a nurse as well.
Anyhow, I went to my scheduled appointment Thursday morning and I met with the nurse first. She seemed a little surprised that I had already started my blood glucose monitoring and went through all my logs for my blood glucose history. That actually bothered me because then she double-checked my little machine that tests it. I wasn't aware that it had a 30 day saved history of all my monitored numbers, but I know now. The nurse made a comment that even though I shrugged it off at the time it seems to really be bothering me the longer I think about it. She said something along the lines that I couldn't lie about my numbers because my machine keeps a record. First of all, ALL of my numbers did line up with what was logged into my blood glucose log. Secondly, I don't have a reason to lie about it. What good does lying about my numbers do for me or my baby girl, anyway? Doesn't make sense to me! Like I said, the more I think about it, the more upset I continue to get. FRUSTRATING!!!!
I even had to get weighed there, which irritated me as well. Of course, the RN asked me about my little weight gain and about what my doctor said about it. I just haven't been able to gain much weight this pregnancy. I have been eating. I was just extremely nauseous the entire first two trimesters and a little into my third. For I know I went to this appointment a little apprehensive and just unsure as to what to expect, but the nurse just got on my nerves a little. However, the dietician was great and I really enjoyed talking with her. She seemed informative and didn't come across judgmental at all. I have to go back one more time next week for just an hour meeting and write down everything I eat and how many carbohydrates are in all my foods. I am supposed to eat several times a day and not go too long in-between my meals/snacks. The dietician explained that I needed to eat 30-40 carbohydrates for breakfast, 30-50 carbohydrates for lunch and dinner and 15-30 carbohydrates for my 3 snacks each day. I'm not use to eating so often and somedays I really don't know if I am going to be able to get all those in. For instance, I have been teaching the 2 and 3-year-old class at church on Sunday mornings, which means I won't get that snack in between breakfast and lunch. Oh well, I guess, I will figure out what works for me and stick to what they want as closely as possible. Overall, the eating plan probably won't be too bad, I have tried to eat really healthy for the most of my pregnancy anyway and they told me I won't gain very much weight if I follow my gestational diabetic eating guidelines. I actually had almost gained 5 pounds and I already lost a few of those by trying to eat less carbohydrates. I am not sure if I am supposed to be concerned about the lack of weight I have gained. At this point, I have only gained 2-3 pounds. I guess I will try not to worry about it too much unless my doctor seems to have a problem with it.
I had another ultrasound scheduled this week as well because of the gestational diabetes. I was not happy about the reason it had to be done, but it was nice seeing my baby girl move around and see her so well developed and healthy. The ultrasound did show her still in a breech position though. I was not worried about it at first, but I when I saw my doctor for my appointment he was concerned and scheduled a fetal cephalic version that is where they will flip the baby if she does not turn before my appointment. I am nervous about that and left my doctor's office in tears. I just don't know what to expect and I know it is not going to be a comfortable appointment. In addition to that, it is only about 60% effective. He also gave me an exercise to do to help the baby turn. I am really hoping that it helps. I will also be doing quite a bit of research, maybe I can figure out some other ways to help this little girl of mine turn.
Going back to my ultrasound though, I was not very happy with the technician. I wanted pictures and I had mentioned at the end, "aren't we getting a few pictures of our baby". She said that they don't have to give pictures at every ultrasound and that the 20-week ultrasound was the one where they give all the cute pictures. I told her that I had an ultrasound before with my son Quinton when I was like 37 weeks and the technician gave me pictures. She commented, "of what?" I was offended, but replied, "The technician gave me a few pictures of his face, and I got one of his foot and one of his hand. She seemed irritated and at this point, I was ready to cry. She said that she could try and get a picture if I really wanted. I needed my husband to speak up at this point and he just sat there. I couldn't talk anymore without bursting into tears. I looked at my husband and asked him if it was important to him and he just said, "it's fine, we don't need them". I told her just "don't worry about it". I was so angry, but I couldn't stay in there anymore without crying and I just wanted to leave. I left there, wouldn't talk to my husband and started crying in the van. He tried to ask me what was wrong and I just ignored him. Finally, he pulled over and asked and then I started crying more and I said that he should have said something. I was expecting the ultrasound to be a good thing, but it just ended up really upsetting me. I think I have been even more emotional since I got my gestational diabetes diagnosis. I just didn't want to break down in tears in front of the technician and I couldn't talk to her anymore without doing that. My husband heard me argue with her (although it was all polite). I was so frustrated that he didn't say anything. I guess, he wasn't noticing how important it was to me; I just wish it had been more important to him as well. Miscommunication is difficult at times, especially when I am hormonal.
Well, despite the frustrating things about his week, there are some really exciting things as well. My husband and I have finally narrowed down our sweet baby girl's name. We will either use Jewelianna CoraMae or Lilyanna CoraMae. I think we will still keep both names until she is born and then decide on her name after we get to see her sweet little face. We have never done that before, so I am not 100% sure, we will keep to that, but we are both happy with the idea for now. In addition, I know I mentioned before that I wasn't in love with the name Lilianna, but it has grown on me and it really is very pretty. However, I insisted on using the spelling Lilyanna instead of Lilianna if we use that name. I want to keep both meanings of the names Lily and Anna, so I wanted the name to be separated enough where I think both meanings will still be attached to the name. That is the same reason why I decided on the spelling Jewelianna instead of Julianna as well. Anyhow, I am just incredibly excited to have narrowed down the name. I was worried we wouldn't have her name before she was born and I was beginning to have some crazy dreams of having a nameless baby girl. It was actually very stressful to me.
Another exciting even that will be happening soon is that next week is my baby shower. It will be Sunday, July 22 at 1pm. My dear friend Glory is putting it on for me with some help from her sweet sister and another dear friend. I am looking forward to it. It will be wonderful to have some time to just focus on the baby, have fun, and visit with friends. The last few weeks have just been so stressful for me, so I know it will be a very much-needed time away. With this pregnancy, I just feel like I haven't had enough time to take care of baby things or anything else for that matter.
Until next time,