I'm Bridget and my husband is Tom. We've been married for 15 years and we're expecting our third child sometime around Thanksgiving 2005. We have two amazing little girls, Madeleine, 4, and Alexandra just turned 2 in March.
I'll be 39 in June. Tom is 42. Gosh, that seems old. How did we get that old and what are we doing still having babies? That's a darn good question. We were married for ten years before we had our first child. I guess we were just busy. Traveling, playing, being self-indulgent. I really enjoyed working and had a hard time imaging what life would be like without a career. Not that you can't have a career and have children, many women do and do it well. Just knowing myself, I know I would not do a good job juggling both. Now that I have children, I simply cannot imagine life without them. There's pros and cons to having children later in life. Financially, we're established and not struggling. We've spent a lot of time alone building a solid marriage. I have a lot more patience than I think I would have had in my 20s. I can say without question that it feels good, really good to be headed down this path once again. The downside is that I just feel tired. Little people wear me out! And pregnancy is hard on my body. I've managed to lose all the baby weight both times, but not without a lot of effort.
I'm not exactly sure when we decided we wanted a third child. I remember feeling a little panicked last summer at the thought of being done. We were barely out of baby-mode with Ally but life was beginning to get just a tad easier. Tom was feeling like we were done, and then I shared my thoughts with him about feeling like someone was missing. We went back and forth for a few months. He would be ready and then I would get cold feet. Having a third complicates things a bit. Do we get a bigger house? We definitely would need a bigger car. It all came down to wanting the girls to have another sibling. By fall, we decided we definitely wanted one more child.
With both Maddie and Ally, we got pregnant the first month we tried. With this baby, we had to work at it a little harder. Last summer my cycles stopped being regular and I was no longer a 28-day girl, so pinpointing ovulation was a little tricky. We tried for four months and then on the fifth month, I had a horrid cold and happened to half-heartedly tell Tom that I think it was "that time" again not even really giving it much thought.
About two weeks later, I'm sitting in my hair-dresser's chair and all I can think about is a McDonald's filet of fish sandwich. The only time I ever eat fast food is in the first trimester. I cannot explain why, it's just something that I need to do. So, it occurred to me at that point that I might possibly be pregnant. I had a few errands to run after my hair appointment, but the thought of that fish sandwich kept creeping into my thoughts. By the time I got home later that afternoon, I told Tom that I thought I was pregnant and why and he just laughed it off. I think he thought I was crazy. Well, I took a hpt and crazy or not, I was pregnant. Oh, and by the way, I did indulge in that darn fish sandwich and I regretted it in a big way.
So, here we are. This is my fourth and final pregnancy. I had a miscarriage in October 1999. It was twins but it wasn't meant to be. The fetuses never developed and I miscarried at 12 weeks. Our first daughter, Madeleine was conceived on our 10th anniversary trip to Italy. She was born in February 2001. Two years later we had Alexandra "Ally" in March 2003. They are the most delightful little girls. I'm just a tad biased, of course. Full of personality and spunk. They are really close and adore each other. Their temperaments are quite different. I'm interested in what a third child will do to the family relationship dynamic. No longer will there be this tendency to compare, but I think just an acceptance that they are their own little unique selves. We will have three individuals no longer two opposites. I can't wait to meet this baby!!
There are so many clichés about pregnancy that are true. It is such a miracle. It's an incredible process. I'm thrilled to be able to share my journey with you!