Why I should have daily (possibly even hourly) deliveries of Klondike bars . . .
Recently, there have been a bunch of new commercials on TV for Klondike bars and their new thicker chocolatey shell. I have been meaning to write into the Klondike Marketing Department, since I have a TON of suggestions for things they could use in their commercials. Because, as you fellow moms know, the depths of grossness to which one sinks in motherhood are unmatched in any other arena in life. I mean, toddlers do gross stuff, but they don't know how gross it is. Case in point, BG peed in her bath water two or three times tonight, then filled up a tea cup with said pee water and drank it. Yum. But, for a Klondike bar, would you drink water your daughter just peed in, just to see the delight in her face when you joined her tea party? Well, in this instance, it turns out I would NOT do that - I faked it. She is still little enough to not realize when Mommy isn't really drinking or eating the stuff she offers me. But, here are a bunch of things I have done (haven't we all??!), prepped and ready to be made into Klondike bar commercials.
Would you catch puke in your hand? (Why do we do this anyway - like it's bad if puke ends up on the table/chair/floor/pant leg?)
Would you jump out of bed in the middle of the night and clean up the puke that didn't make it into your hand off the floor? (To be fair, this was DH, not me. What a guy!)
Would you use your t-shirt to wipe ropes of green snot off your kid's face?
Would you eat cold peas mixed with applesauce and ketchup, just to show your little one how delicious it is?
Would you scoop poop out of the bathtub?
Would you put your nose up to the darling bottom of an equally darling child who has been having the smelliest diapers ever to see if that smell is from the child or the petting zoo animals? (It's better than Great-grandma's finger-test, at least.)
Would you push a stroller around your block, 31 weeks pregnant, unshowered, wearing Piglet pajama pants and no bra, because your daughter wanted to go for a walk?
Would you share your favorite fast food beverage (sweet tea, strawberry smoothie, iced mocha, etc) with a back-washing toddler?
Would you accept partially-chewed cookies and other food items in your hand because it is better than having it end up on the floor?
Would you read "There's a Wocket in My Pocket" 8 times in a row? And sound just as excited each time?
I'm sure you all have many, many more suggestions. It's amazing how your perspective changes when you have to take care of a little person. Things you never would have dreamed of doing become routine, and yes, you catch puke without a second thought. Ahhh, motherhood.
Until next time,