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Week 38
~ Waiting, waiting, waiting . . .
Well, Dr. Bey says that "it can be any day now." Had an appointment on Wednesday and he said that it could be today, tomorrow, or anytime. I added, "or two weeks from now." We laughed, but it's true.
A little progress has taken place. I'm finally at 1 cm dilated. Somehow this doesn't thrill me. It doesn't "compute" with all of the activity that's been going on with me. Still the cramping and contractions. Some days I am in so much pain. It's hard to believe that I'm not further than 1 cm.
Several of the ladies from the "Due October" group on Prodigy have already delivered. I am sincerely happy for them, yet I admit that I wish were one of them holding my baby as well. There's one lady who was due 9/30 and still haven't delivered. I
really feel for her. I wish that she goes next. I can't imagine going beyond my due date. That would drive me crazy! Well,
crazier than I already am <g>.
I have slipped into a semi-depression state. I don't get excited about anything that's happening to me because I know that it
means nothing. It hurts emotionally every time I expect to see the mucous plug and don't. It just hurts when I feel the cramping in my back, radiating to the front, and learning that it means nothing. So, I guess this stupor that I'm in is simply my wall to protect from disappointment.
Guess I'll be saying the same things next week.
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