Christian's Pregnancy Journal

Week 17
~ Let me see your . . . Birth Control???

Christian at 17 weeksThatís just what I've been thinking about this week: What method of Birth Control will I be using after this pregnancy? (If youíre wondering where I got the title of my entry, itís a "house music" song all about a guy taking a girl to his house for a one-night stand, but asking to see her birth control first. I really hate the song, but as I was thinking about writing this entry thatís all I kept thinking about. And end of very long footnote. )

Surprisingly, I was asked the birth control question three times at my last appointment. Since Iíve found out about my pregnancy with little bit, I was definitely going to ask for a tubal ligation. As the pregnancy continues to progress, Iím becoming a bit more confused. Then I think I'm only 17 weeks why the heck am I worrying about something I have at the very least 23 more weeks to think about.

My doctor would rather me try some different pills or maybe an IUD. She's says she thinks I'm too young to make such a permanent decision. I agree with her. Although I keep saying this is my LAST one, I haven't as of yet become settled with the idea of never being able to have a child again. I may turn 30 and decide I want to have just one more. Having a good 20-25 child-bearing years left is frightening also. As you can see, I'm still clueless as to the final decision. I donít think it'll be a tubal. Solomon isn't thrilled with the idea of something being so permanent and me being whisked to surgery right after the birth of our son or daughter. Surgery plus caring for a newborn and toddler is definitely enough to cause a meltdown.

What else is new this week?

I'm already leaking colostrum. I can't believe my body is ready to feed a baby that still has at least 20 more weeks of baking. I even had to go out and buy Lansinoh because my nipples were starting to dry and crack, I guess from water and soap contact in the shower. I plan on breastfeeding again this time around. Psalm nursed for eight months and it was an enjoyable experience. It was extremely difficult in the beginning. I had problems with engorgement and did a lot of supplementing with formula in the beginning because we had latch problems and she had a bit of jaundice. After many tears we finally got it right until I got a nasty skin infection, which my doctor said was possibly caused by the sugars in her mouth from solids. I could have continued giving her expressed milk, but I also wanted to start a combination birth control pill and my marriage was experiencing several stresses that affected my milk supply, so I stopped cold turkey. Talking about it, I still feel bad. I've made the recommended year commitment this time around. I'm better educated now on what I will need to make this experience a more successful one, such as a good electric pump, nursing pillow, and tons of support.

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I also am beginning to think I'm having a little girl. I had this same feeling when I was pregnant with Psalm. I wanted to believe so badly I was having a boy, but in the back of my mind was this small inkling of a feeling that it was a girl. I've been taking these little quizzes based on old wives tales for fun and they all say between 60-75% girl. I could just be psyching myself out, but if I find it's a girl I would be freaked out. Just three, well since I write my journals on the first day of the next week, just two more weeks until the mystery is solved. Either way I'd be thrilled. Healthy is the most important.

Oh! I submitted a belly picture this week. Iíve made some progress from looking plain fat to looking preggers. Or so I think. We still have a bit more "rounding" to do.

Take care until next week,

Chris

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