Weeks 23 & 24 ~ June 10, 2005
~ Busy But Smooth
Not much new to report. Both Nic and I are working a ton right now. We are each working on a monster project with a big deadline, in addition to our regular work. I did have a doctor's appointment and everything was fine. The heartbeat was nice and strong (156 BPM) and she confirmed the results from the 'big' ultrasound came back normal with dates and sizes still on track for a 9/21 due date. My weight gain for the month was, once again, shocking, but she reassured me that I am still on target for a 35 lb. overall weight gain. I think she is out of her mind! At the rate I am going, I say I am in trouble. But I am not a doctor, so we'll go with her. She says that my weight gain will probably taper off at the end; that I was a small build to begin and there tends to be a bigger weight gain initially with a small framed woman. Like I said, we shall see. I have gained about 20 lbs already, in case you really need to know (that was painful to disclose, more than last week's entry, if you can believe it).
I have been thinking heavily about birthing techniques and classes, but have not taken any action yet. I still can't decide what to do. I keep telling myself not to worry too much about it, but it is starting to feel like I am getting lazy. I remember back to the movie, Look Who's Talking, and Kristie Alley's character laying in the hospital in labor crying that she dropped out of Lamaze and just to give her drugs…I really don't want that to be me, but that is the road I feel I am headed down. I need to get my butt in gear and make a decision. The other thing that scares me, and is causing some of my hesitation, is the fact that my back is killing me. The pain I am feeling, which is sometimes momentarily debilitating, makes me think I will not be able to handle a natural childbirth so why bother taking classes on it? You know? Why not just succumb to modern medicine, walk into the hospital, get my epidural and say deliver my baby for me please? Ok, ok, now I am just being a petulant child. I can hear it my head. Man, have the hormones kicked in or what?
So, a few days have passed since the paragraphs above and guess what?! Yep, I have made a decision! My prenatal yoga instructor has come through again with lots of information and names for instructors for just about any method you could want, Hypnobirthing, Lamaze, Birthing From Within, and Bradley Method. So, after a lot of thinking I chose the Bradley Method. The instructor that teaches this particular class is not what they call a 'Bradley Nazi', in that she has a more holistic and flexible approach to natural, husband-coached, childbirth. In other words, if at some point in my labor, I choose or need to have an epidural or some other medical intervention procedure I will not have 'failed'. That was a critical factor for me. I did not want Nic and I to go through 24 hours of classes only to feel like we failed if we needed pain meds at some point in the process. So, we are set for our first of eight classes starting this Sunday evening. I couldn't be more nervous and excited all at the same time. I am really looking forward to sharing this with Nic. So, that is done. Phew.
As for other pregnancy related stuff, things are going smoothly (other than the back pain). She moves around allllllll the time and it is captivating. I don't care what I am doing, watching TV, reading a good book, sitting in a meeting... once she starts kicking and wiggling I am 100% focused on her. I really love watching the movements… seeing my whole belly jump with a really big kick and seeing it ripple with a slow roll. I love to guess what she is doing or how she is positioned. All of the movements are below my belly button and it still feels like she is sideways, but I am not sure. Joshua felt her move twice for the first time last week and he seemed so proud of himself! He said, "The first one I wasn't sure, but with the second I knew!"
My mom came down and spent hours and hours with me registering at Babies R Us last weekend! THANK YOU, Mom!!! I couldn't have done it without her. I would have walked right out the store without registering for a thing; it was just so overwhelming. I spent over an hour just picking out the car seat and stroller! But in the end we really had fun, and she was such a huge help with not only her unwavering patience but her seemingly genuine enjoyment and her great advice! Nic would have gone with me if I had wanted, but I just knew that with my hormones and my particularity we would probably just end up frustrating each other. Besides, this way he got to stay home and do some stuff around the house that needed to be done and he got to play in his garden. So he was a happy camper.
Ladies, I have got to tell you that when the books say your husbands will be freaking out at some point about money and having a new baby, they are right! And it will come out in subtle ways. Guys get nervous, too. And Ladies, your man has emotional needs, too. They need to be reassured and paid attention to. I must say I have been totally remiss and neglectful. I know that I am the one with hormones and physical changes to deal with and I am the one struggling with being a pregnant career woman (kind of difficult in some work environments, even in the year 2005), but this doesn't excuse me from engaging him in a dialogue about his feelings. Which is not easy to do, right? After all, with a guy, you can't just say 'how do you feel about that?' Or can you? I don't know. I will let you know as I go on my way in the next few weeks trying to be a more sensitive, caring pregnant wife (ha!)!! Nic has always been there for me; it is my turn to reciprocate.
Oh, and we bought a crib!! Yippee!! I had been thinking of buying a crib and furniture set online, used, but hadn't found anything spectacular yet. And last Saturday morning, my husband I were laying in bed and I was sort of dreaming still, and I thought 'garage sales!' but then quickly realized it was already too late in the morning to start that. So we got up and got ready to go the nursery for some plants and on the way down the street we passed a garage sale. We both looked at each and I said, 'Did you see a couple of cribs?' and he said, 'Yes'. So, we flipped the car around and bought ourselves a beautiful, nearly perfect crib for the steal of the century, $50!!! Yee Haw!
Ok, well I have droned on long enough. See ya next week!