~ Dreaming of Our Baby
A few nights ago I watched The Business of Being Born, which is a documentary done by Ricki Lake about birth options besides hospitals and doctors. It explores childbirth throughout history and the safety of birth options available to women--debunking the myth that hospital birth is the safest choice. It was very well done and interesting and I am still haunted by the images of women who were given "twilight sleep" as a pain-relief option in childbirth (my great aunt was relaying to me at Thanksgiving that this is how she birthed at least one of her children in the 1940s, but until I watched the documentary last night, I had no idea what it was, and apparently she didn't either).
Again I teared up after seeing multiple women give birth to their babies. It's such a sweet and horrifying moment all at the same time, but I'm starting to be desensitized to it, which is good. And it made me long for the moment when I can meet my baby. After watching the movie, my husband and I took some time to read a book about how to get your baby to sleep through the night that my cousin gave us. We're preparing early. And, then, I went to bed.
All these thoughts of babies apparently put the baby on my brain while sleeping, because I dreamed about our baby being born. I dreamed about the moment she comes out--about breastfeeding her and getting to hold her. It was such a sweet dream and I woke up a little sad that it wasn't true. Also very glad, since she would be premature if born today. But, you know what I'm saying.
She's been on my mind more and more lately because we go on vacation this week for the holidays and, when we get back, we will only have two months left before my due date to get everything ready! We haven't started moving things around or even really thinking about furniture for the baby's room. I'm trying not to feel overwhelmed thinking about all I have to do and just take it one step at a time. But, it's coming so fast all of a sudden and I just want to be ready for when she arrives. I feel like I have baby on the brain all the time. I'm a little worried that's all I talk about!