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Entry Thirty-nine ~ January 1999

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" . . . and everything will feel right where it belongs"

I keep intending to write a nice long entry to update you all on everything that has transpired. I think I will either have to write briefly, or not at all.

Parenthood continues to be wonderful! I am very, very happy with how things have worked out. In my first journal entry I stated, "I know that once we have a baby in our arms, (even if it is much later and different than we first planned), I just know that everything will feel worth it, the timing will feel just perfect, and everything will feel right where it belongs!" I could not word how I feel right now more accurately than this. We had hoped at first to have a child through fertility efforts; we instead have built our family through adoption. It almost feels like a close call! If my fertility procedures had worked, then we would not have Elizabeth. And I would not want to parent anybody else but her. It feels like it worked out just right.

Life never slows down, does it? My mother-in-law had a sudden diagnosis of colon cancer several weeks ago. I fortunately had a just-by-chance errand which took me over to her house, and I found her extremely ill. (She had been fine just two days before, when we lunched with her). I rushed her to the doctor, who instructed me to rush her to the emergency room. She was put on IV fluids to reverse her severe dehydration. She had cancer surgery thirty-six hours later. She stayed with us for awhile, as she recovered from her surgery. She teased that I had two babies to care for. It was wonderful to have her as a house guest, but the ordeal also was very exhausting.

A day or so after she left, I returned back to work. Returning to work was much more difficult than I anticipated! I returned part-time, and thought that it would not be so difficult. I was so wrong. If I had any doubts about bonding with Elizabeth, my first day at work set those to rest. It was also sad for me because I had this wonderful three-month mommy/baby cocoon, where my whole life was about Elizabeth. Now it is over, and I am back in the outside world seeking to balance work and family life. But what a happy challenge this is!

Elizabeth is doing very well, by the way. She is three months old, weighs about sixteen pounds, and is astonishingly long. She can sit up unsupported, has perfect head control, has discovered her hands, is bringing everything to her mouth for further exploration, can push her body up with her hands if she is on her tummy, can support her body weight somewhat if placed on her feet, babbles wonderfully and "converses" with great earnestness. She looks at her toys and books with such interest. She loves music. (Actually, she screams at Mozart but quiets down if we play "oldies" or bright bouncy popular music, soft new age music, or soothing rhythmical music such as Bach or Handel). She has a very funny love/hate relationship with her Elmo doll. Either she laughs and babbles and squeezes her Elmo, or she screams at him. She is still a very sensitive baby, with a fairly high emotional intensity. She has very strong opinions about things (such as Mozart). She only accepts one kind of bottle nipple, one kind of pacifier, and the like. She informs you loudly and with great emotion if you get it wrong! Her eyes are so bright and alert. She is a complete and total delight.

We are looking forward to a very happy new year with our new daughter, and wish you the happiest of New Years as well.
Kay Grames

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