~ The Green-Eyed Monster (With the Yellow Belly)
This week has definitely been an interesting one. Apparently I was wrong last week when I wrote that I had finally figured out my body's fibre needs. I'll spare you the gory details, but I was really sick at the beginning of the week and spent a night curled up on the bathroom floor with horrible gas cramps and Braxton Hicks. They were so bad I actually wondered at one point if I could be going into labour - in fact, if it had been a month later I probably would have made Aaron take me to the hospital to check. At the very least, my hemorrhoids haven't come back, and I seem to be doing better now (famous last words, I know)
Also this week, Aaron decided he will be changing jobs. The company he currently works for is in Chapter 11 and issuing lay-offs on a weekly basis - a rather scary situation for us as new home owners and expecting parents - so when he got offered a similar job with a competing company he decided to take it. It looks like he'll be doing mostly the same things with many of the same people (a number of his co-workers have also been hired) for a little bit better pay, but less vacation time. Not only that, but they are even going to let him take his Parental Leave when I have the baby (this was a major worry for us with him switching jobs at this point) and our Health Benefits start right away. I am so relieved, I cannot put it into words. We probably would have been ok for a while if he had been let go, but things would have definitely been tight, and it is just a big weight off my shoulders knowing that we will still have money coming in. Also, because of company policy, once he gives his 2 Weeks Notice on Monday he will be sent home with pay, so he will have a two week vacation during which we plan to try and re-do our kitchen floor (which is in desperate need of repair).
And now to deal with the event that inspired the title of this week's entry. My next door neighbour had her baby this week - which is great and I couldn't be happier for her, except that she had such a wonderful birth experience that I can't help but be jealous. Her baby came 10 days early and weighed just over 6 lbs, and she had a completely natural Home Birth with no drugs and only 9 hours of labour, mostly overnight. Not only that, but it went completely textbook (lost mucous plug, water broke, contractions started, baby came) and she had no tears or anything! I saw her about 10 hours after the birth and she looked great, although, of course, she was a bit sore and thinks she may have cracked her tailbone. Even still, I'm jealous. Not that I want a Home Birth (really, I'm much more comfortable with the idea of a hospital), and I have a feeling I'll be calling for an epidural pretty quickly (I had contractions both before and after my D&C last pregnancy and I know how painful they are), but I have a feeling that my labour is not going to go nearly as smoothly (I'm picturing at least a week late and a minimum of 20 hours of labour, but maybe that's just the pessimist in me). I've been reading a lot of Birth Stories on StorkNet because I want to have some idea of what I'm in for (or could be in for) and I'm trying not to dwell on the bad things, but I am totally a worrier (and yet, I can't stop reading them). I'm freaked out by the idea of an episiotomy (I really need to start working on my Birth Plan so I can record these things) and worried about bleeding after the baby comes out (I'm a bleeder), but I'm even more freaked out by the idea of a Cesarean (which is a possibility because I have surgical scars from a laproscopy a few years ago, not to mention the fact that this baby loves lying transverse). Sigh. I know that there's nothing I can do except try not to worry (and stay in good shape, do my Kegels, and start some perineal massage). And maybe I'll feel a bit better about things after a few prenatal classes (which start on Monday). But really I think I just need to keep in mind that this is something most women go through, and they survive it, and I will too. Besides, there's such a great prize at the end that makes it all worthwhile. I can do this.
Well, I guess that's it for this week. Next week looks to be pretty busy with starting on the kitchen floor and cleaning in preparation for a visit from my parents (I've already been bitten by the Spring Cleaning/Nesting Bug, so there shouldn't be too much to do), and it'll be great to have Aaron home for a while to help out with things. I'll let you know the week goes in my next entry.