~ A sad week
My granddad passed away unexpectedly this week. It has been an emotional, busy and trying week. We were woken by a call early Friday morning from my mum saying that Grandad had suffered a massive stroke and they were keeping him alive at the hospital, but they expected him to die soon, and that we needed to go and say our goodbyes. So I got Levi up and ready and headed to the hospital, luckily we only live 10 minutes away. We arrived at the hospital where most of the rest of the family were and we said goodbye and sat with him. He was in a deep coma but we like to think he could hear what we were saying. A few hours later he passed away.
The following days have been difficult but in a sense really wonderful as well. My extended family (the progeny of my grandparents) are incredibly close and we have all banded together to help each other grieve and come to terms with losing Grandad. Grandad left behind a wife of 64 years, 5 children, 15 grandchildren and 18 great-grandchildren, with 3 more on the way, so there are a lot of us when we all get together! Brandon was really wonderful, and took on even more of the task of looking after Levi when he could so that I could spend time with my family. Having Levi is such a blessing I think. I was forced to stay happy for him, and he still needed me to care for him, so when Brandon was at work, I wasn't given a lot of time to dwell on the sadness of our loss. Given the fact that I am hyper-emotional (thanks to those lovely pregnancy hormones) at the best of times this was a really good thing!
The funeral was two days ago and it went well. We were able to celebrate Grandad's wonderful life and farewell him in a really beautiful way. I was able to make it through without turning into a complete basket-case, something I was very relieved about. At the moment I cry at the drop of a hat so I thought I would be a disaster.
Having someone close to you die while you are pregnant is makes you so acutely aware of the circle of life (for want of a better term). I really felt the cross over of farewelling one life and welcoming another. I thought that I would be sad that Grandad missed out on meeting our new baby, but I actually feel like they are more closely connected because their entries and exits to and from this world are so close. We even like to think that Grandad might be giving the baby a few pointers before she's born!
My apologies if this entry seems a bit all over the place. Trying to put into words how I have felt over the last week hasn't been easy! I am determined though to keep on working hard to look after my family and myself and try to help us all to be healthy and happy. That's what Grandad would have wanted.
Til next week,