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Kelly's Parenting Journal

Entry 4 ~ February 5, 2010
~ He's 6 months Going on 6 Years

My son is growing and becoming more independent. We had a little chat the other night and I told him he was six months and not six years old. He is doing wonderful. He is rolling all over the place and he can roll both ways. He can sit assisted and is trying to sit by himself. He is holding his head up on his own. When feeding him his bottle, he wants to hold it and for baby food he wants to hold the spoon and feed himself. He refuses to nap and doesn't like to sleep at night. He is getting so big and I am so proud of him for accomplishing everything that he has so far.

We saw the cardiologist, and they said that he still has a small whole in his heart. I don't understand this because that is why he had the heart surgery so why didn't they fix it all? One heart surgery led to five other surgeries. I do not want him to have to go through that again. They said as long as it stays small, they won't operate again but if it gets bigger, they will have to go back in. He also saw the neurosurgeon. His CT scan looked good and the shunt is working the way it is supposed to so they will see him again in six months. They also gave me a script for a helmet for him. I called the place and they are making sure the insurance will cover it first and then they will make the appointment because it costs $3000 dollars for one. I don't need that kind of bill. So hopefully the insurance will pay for it. His head is really misshapen.

He also saw his pediatrician and got his immunizations and his synagis shot. He has to get that once a month for 5 months. It is to prevent RSV. He gained another pound in a week so he is up to 15 pounds. However he moved from the third percentile to the fifth so I am really happy about that. He is still small but growing fast.

I really miss him during the day. I would like to ask any mothers out there if you are a working mom how you handle being away from your kids all day. I just have such a hard time being at work. All I do is think about him all day and talk about him and constantly calling his daycare to check on him and when his dad has him I always am calling home and talking to him. I hate it. I miss him so much. I know that I need to work because we couldn't afford to live on just one paycheck but this is hard. I like my job and if I didn't have him I would be happy coming to work everyday but I just want to be at home with my son. I feel like I am missing out on his life. I work from 9-6 and I pick him up and then it's time to feed him and bathe him and I only get about an hour to play with him and then it's time for bed. My weekends are okay because I spend all day with him but during the week it's just not enough time.

He is turning seven months on the 16th of February and I am excited. We are going on Tuesday to talk to the pastor at the church about getting him and I baptized. We will be baptized at the same time. I am the youngest out of five kids and all my other siblings were baptized. By the time they got to me they just didn't do it. After all that happened with the baby, I am certain that God has a plan for him and he is meant to be here and I have so much faith now that I want to get us both baptized. I don't know if that makes sense to you all but it sure does to me.

I will let you all know how things go next time.

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