~ Baby Shower Porn
Well, school officially came to an end, thank goodness. There were many frantic emails and phone calls to my sub trying to get questions answered about what was going on with my grades, but eventually I was able to clean out my classroom on Tuesday. For the first time ever, I was able to store things in the room instead of taking everything home! It's SO much easier expecting to be at the same site next year.
We had a last-workday luncheon later that day, which was really too expensive for one meal ($25), but I have to admit it was a really good meal. It's too bad my stomach doesn't hold enough to get the most out of buffets these days. It was at a Brazilian food place downtown, and they come slice the meat right at your table. Mmmm.
Before going to the luncheon, I was talking to some other teachers in the office, and my sausage fingers dropped some papers. I bent down to pick them up, and they both freaked out, yelling "NO!!" Everyone in the office looked, and I'm sure I turned red as I reassured them I'm fine. I can pick things up ok . . . I just look funny doing it. It's not a pretty process, but it gets the job done. I just squat basically. It doesn't hurt at all, but apparently it looks freakier than I had realized. I just feel so needy if I ask people to pick things up when I'm actually feeling energetic enough to do it myself.
We went to a childbirth class last week where we learned about everything from focal points and breathing to epidurals and birthing balls. We also took a tour of the Labor and Delivery floor of the hospital and saw a labor room. It's all starting to get very real, which is ok by me. I want this little spaz out! Every evening for about three hours she kicks and moves very painfully waaay over on my right side. I have to apply counterpressure to keep from crying. I've been using my little bits of energy to do her laundry, organize her room, and try to keep the house from getting any dirtier in these last few weeks.
Ok, now to explain the title of the entry. I mentioned in my last entry that I had my family/friends baby shower a week ago Saturday, June 14. My mother just gave me a CD of photos taken by my sister. I have a cute sleeveless dress on, something I had worn to my work baby shower a month earlier. There are nice photos of people milling around, and then of me opening gifts . . . and my legs. It is getting harder to sit with my legs closed (they just fall open naturally), and in about 16 of the 200 pictures, you can see up between my legs in this dress!
But wait . . . it's NOT a crotch shot. No, it just LOOKS like one. There IS actually ONE real crotch shot, but of course it's pretty nondescript with the plain white undies I'm wearing these days. The problem is these pictures are WORSE than a crotch shot of my white maternity bikini briefs would be . . . it's my giant, fat thighs so smooshed together that it looks like a huge hairless vajajay! I have inadavertently joined the ranks of Britney Spears and Dita von Teese and those other crotch-shot divas, without ever even going commando.
I debated whether to post a mild pseudo-crotch shot here, and then thought better of it. I'm posting a cute picture of the baby's first name tag, with her Daddy's finger pointing at her (just before he left for the shower). I hope the rest of the pics never come back to haunt me . . .