Week 18 ~ January 27, 2003
~ Still no pants!
This is making me nuts! Am I destined to spend this entire pregnancy looking for pants? The ones from Gap are awful and I knew they would be. Too full at the bottom, too long, too tight in the legs and there is no way my waist will every grow enough to fit into them! So back they go! The stretch pants from Land's End were also huge so I am going to try a size smaller in them. Whining here . . . but I don't want all stretch pants! I got the twill pants from Land's End as well and I just don't know about them. I love the zipper in the back as it does keep the pants smoother, but the waist is really bunched up by the time I adjust it enough to fit me. Consequently I have to wear my shirts much longer to cover the bag around the crotch. They also seem to be a bit fuller cut around the bottom. I really do not like boot leg pants. What to do? What to do?
Went to a Super Bowl Party last night and got caught testing my blood sugar. I was with a group of friends that I hadn't told yet . . . It is very hard to explain. I love these friends, but when I got pregnant with Brigid our relationships changed so much. None of them has elected to go beyond two children and I am sure they all question my decision to have more. I know that it is really none of their concern, however, their change in attitude did hurt a bit. They have all returned to work part time so of course our chances to socialize together are restricted. They also all live in town so I do feel left out of all their get-togethers. Anyway, I hadn't decided if I was going to say anything or not. But since I did get caught and everyone asked, I told. The congratulations were warm and genuine and of course I felt like an idiot for not having shared sooner.
What else . . . Oh yeah . . . How could I forget? My amnio results . . . All is perfect and we are having a baby girl. The boys were shocked and are feeling outnumbered. I stressed to Stuart how God must think that he is so special that he needs to remain the only boy in the family. Then I went on to play the blame game and tell him that if he really had a problem with it, he needed to talk to Dad, since the determination of the sex of the baby was Dad's department. Michael claims that is a story women have made up to make themselves feel better about the fact they can't provide their husbands with the baby of the husband's choice. What a crock! He was joking . . . promise!
So many times this week I really became overwhelmed at what is happening to me. I just can't explain it. I am truly so blessed. I cannot say it enough. I can honestly say that every bit of this pregnancy has been covered in blessings. My morning sickness was short and easily dealt with. I am able to fit a 30 minute nap in most days. I can feel the baby moving. The insomnia even gives me an opportunity for some very deep conversations with God. My gestational diabetes is under control and Max even agreed to letting me try the insulin at night for 2 weeks to see if my way works. Of course it is, I knew I was right. The only issue I can think of so far is not being able to get in the pool for 6 weeks in the heat of the summer. I guess I can deal with that.
Now if someone could just explain to me why I sneeze so much when I am pregnantů