Weeks 34/35 ~ April 27, 2005
~ The Stay-At-Home Mother
This week I became what I've been wanting to be for the last 15 or so years, a stay-at-home mother. When I was 17, I was in the Army and my best girlfriend and I bonded over the fact that more than anything else in our lives we wanted to be moms. We both completed our educations, drove tanks, jumped out of airplanes, were deployed halfway around the world, as well as had a couple of "young" love affairs, but neither of us got married until we were 27 and 30 respectively. Consequently, neither of us had children until into our 30's. She became a mom and then, a stay-at-home mom about 15 months ago. I, on the other hand returned to work about 4 months after Norah was born. And I've continued to work up until Monday of this week.
I have been having back problems pretty much throughout the pregnancy, and now I'm also developing quite a fabulous case of varicose veins. Both problems were enough to merit my doctor's recommendation that I stop working until the baby comes and take it easy these last few weeks. Being that I work on the 3rd floor of a 3-story building, I was only too happy to pass up my several-times-daily climb. Not only that, I realize, my energy and enthusiasm for work has drastically gone down these past 3 or 4 weeks. I am tired at the beginning of the day, exhausted by lunch, and moody in between. So I took the doctor up on his suggestion.
I am still negotiating with my employer about my return to work plan. Luckily, the day my doctor took me out of work, I had just turned in my plan in writing to my supervisor. I listed two options about my return. One included a 3 1/2 month leave of absence and then part time for 6 months before returning full-time. The other is my preferred option. It was a 6 month leave of absence and then a full-time return. Wish me luck that I get what I want! It is a great, stable, interesting, stimulating, fun job that pays very well. Those kinds of careers are hard to come by, and I hate to lose it. I also have the support of my husband and parents with child care, so neither Norah nor the new baby will have to go to daycare. We may choose to put Norah in a 2 year old kindergarten one day per week however, which I know she will love.
So Norah and I have been hanging out and loving it. Dinner is cooked at night when Tim gets home, the weather's been gorgeous, we're played, walked, and strolled out, and we're both pretty much ready for a nice bath and bed. But, it's a nice schedule! I find myself sometimes a little teary-eyed when I am with Norah and I realize these are my last few weeks I'll ever have with her truly alone. It makes me so happy to know the baby's almost here of course. On the other hand, it'll never be just Norah and I, or just Norah, Tim, and I ever again. And that is truly a shining, glorious, happy and sad revelation, all at the same time.
We are also quickly coming up on Tim's sister's wedding. That's the last big thing we'd have lined up until the new baby comes, and here it is upon us. I am amazed at the speed with which this pregnancy has progressed! Next week, I really need to buckle down, and get our boy's room together!
Wow, the days are speeding by. I am hoping I actually go a bit late with this pregnancy, so I can get my act together!!! Stay tuned.