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Robin's Pregnancy Journal

Week 29
~ A Hormonal Mess

So I was thinking since I am just now starting this journal that maybe you would like to get caught up on things before I began this week's stuff . . . so here goes. You know that I am pregnant with #5 and all my kids are boys. I did get to have a routine ultrasound back when I was 20 weeks to make sure everything was okay with the baby and to peek too of course. I wasn't real sure if I wanted to know the sex of the baby being we had all boys; what if this was another boy how? Would I cry or just be happy that I got the chance to have another blessing in my life. Well, there we were in the radiologist's room and he is measuring and looking at the heart and all that good stuff. (Which was all fine.) Rob, by the way, is good at being able to identify the body parts almost as well as the experts. I mean we have had a few. So I know he knew before the doctor told what it was. The doctor got to the privy parts and asked if we wanted to know. I just looked at Rob because I was so scared at this point, and he shook his head yes, we want to know so I told the doctor sure. He says well looks like a girl to me. A girl--can you believe it after 4 boys? I am finally going to have a little girl. My reaction to that was "Rock On' . . . yeah, I said rock on when he told us the sex. Come on was that all I could say?? I was finally getting what I so longed for. A baby girl and all I could say was rock on. I think maybe I was just shocked or maybe was dreaming about what he said. I realized at that moment that God wasn't done with me having babies because he wanted me to have this little girl I so longed for. I thank God every moment for letting me have this blessing.

So on with this week . . . it has been a crazy mess. Between the hormones bringing me down and having to get the boys ready for school is draining me. I am really a mess. I am tired all the time. I just can't seem to get enough sleep. And these hormones are driving me crazy. They make me do crazy stuff like cry all day long for no apparent reason or just be super cranky. Yeah I know I have been pregnant four other times, and I should know how to handle this . . . . not really. My poor husband still has no clue what to think or do when I am in that kind of mood. He just sits quietly and listens to me sob and tries to figure out why I am crying. I can't tell him if I have no idea myself. The days that I am just a crab he just leaves me be. He did say once that it has begun. We have been pregnant enough times that he knows what to expect and what to do I guess. Maybe he just wants to stay out of the way so he can't be the one getting yelled at. I cried this week for two days for no reason at all. I honestly think that I am getting stressed with work. We have been so darn busy that I can't even think straight. At times I don't even get a chance to breathe or sit for a minute. Everyone wants to shop all at the same time. We are very short-handed right now and that doesn't help matters at all. I know one day it will all be all right but not until this baby is born. I just need to quit stressing so much about all the silly stuff I have no control over.

This is the last full week that the boys will be home. That kind makes me sad too. I really enjoy all the kids home at once. We had to do some final shopping this week to get them fully ready for school. That's always fun, for them anyway. We let them pick out their own folders and stuff so that they don't get the same as most of the kids in their class. Chayce got everything he could find in camo. He just loves camo. I have tried forever to try to get him to like something else but he loves the camo. I just picked out all Zak's things since he wasn't here and won't be in time for school to start. I just pick all the plain stuff so that he can draw on the covers. If he can do that he is happy. He loves to draw and is very good at it. Zak is at his dad's house right now and has been for most of the summer. We are going to get him this Sunday. I am excited for him to be back and so are the boys. I will let you know how that goes next week.

I get to go to my midwife next week for our glucose test. This will be my last monthly appointment. I can't believe I'm already starting with the 2 weeks appointments.

Until next week . . .

~ Robin

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