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Shauna's Pregnancy Journal

Week 31 - October 10, 2006
~ Life Goes On

The weather has been so nice lately that I have been much happier, even when I haven't been feeling the best. I wouldn't mind a little rain now too, but at least I can enjoy the overcast days and cool breezes. I'm sure we'll have another heat wave before too long, but I'll enjoy the fall weather while I can.

My pregnancy "sickness" has been overshadowing all other matters lately, and I wanted to take the chance now to catch up and write about a few other things that have been going on in my life.

Halloween is usually a big deal at our house. We like to decorate our front yard for trick-or-treaters and we also like to do family themed costumes, which I make or adapt each year. This year, however, I have no energy or desire for the whole thing. Still, I didn't want to completely be a dud, since this is my husband's favorite holiday. So Fred and I got some Halloween cookie cutters and spent one morning making salt-dough ornaments in the shapes of pumpkins, ghosts, cats and haunted houses. Paul and the kids put up our Christmas tree on our front patio, we strung orange and purple lights on it, and hung up all our cool new Halloween ornaments. We also put some other Halloween decorations to fill it out, and it looks really cool with our light-up pumpkins surrounding it. We also grew some wonderful pumpkins in our garden this year, so they're adding to the festive decorations, and I'm sure we'll have fun carving them in a couple weeks. As for costumes, I think we'll be buying some this year, unless I can get grandma to come over for a sewing day . . .

One day last week I got a very surprising phone call--it was from our adoption agency (how foreign that all seems these days with pregnancy becoming such a consuming part of our lives), telling me that Rose's birth mother had stopped by. I was shocked to hear it, since she is the same birth mother who decided to keep her latest baby rather than place with us earlier this year. Of course I wanted all the news, but there was not much they could tell me. The BM had stopped by during lunch or sometime when most of the office was out, so she really only talked with the receptionist, who did not know the whole background story. I wanted to hear about how things were going for her and the baby--had she moved out from the birth father, did she have a job now, what was she doing for child care, how was the new baby, etc? I have so many questions I would like to ask her. But all they could tell me was that she submitted an updated address and phone number and that she requested some new pictures of Rose. Still, just hearing that she is around and still interested in Rose brought up a lot of emotions in me. It reminded me that, as much as I love adoption, it is not always such a good and happy experience--there are so many heartbreaks and trials associated with the process, which you tend to forget once you have that baby in your arms. I hope this pregnancy turns out similarly--will these trying nine months really be a vague memory in the not too distant future?

Speaking of Rose, I have been meaning to write a little something about her too. For the past few months, she has been going through the most wonderful stage. The terrible twos have gone, and she has been so sweet and charming and happy and delightful. It has been the greatest blessing to me, especially since my patience level has all but disappeared. She can still be a handful at times, of course, but on the whole, she has been a real treat. I have been glad for the time we have been able to bond, with Fred at school most of the day and the new baby not yet come. She is truly my little angel.

Paul and I have been debating over the new baby's name. Russell is still a favorite, and I do like it very much, but I have become increasingly bothered by the closeness of "Russ" and "Rose." I think the names are too similar. I feel that this will cause problems down the line. I had the idea of another name out of the blue that has really stuck with me--"Miles." I like this name for all my other naming criteria, but I also think it is a name that represents the long journey we have come to be at this point. Paul is not sold on it. Fred, however, likes it very much. We also have a few other names in reserve that we like, but none have the sticking power of Russell and Miles. Perhaps it will come down to looking into his newborn face and seeing which one suits him best. And then, what if HE is not a boy after all . . . ? I guess we should be prepared for all options.

And in so many other ways, life goes on . . .

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