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Susan Michelle's Pregnancy Journal

Weeks 19 & 20
~ It's a BOY!!

It's 19 weeks and I've started to wake up in the middle of the night not because I'm thirsty or have to pee but because I am starving! I can't get enough chocolate pudding, whatever we had for dinner, etc. It's so weird because it's like I've added another main meal to my day or should I say night.

I took the kids on Wednesday for their well visit to the Pediatrician. I can't believe that Morgan is five and Shane is three. Where is all of the time going? After the appointment, the kids and I ran tons of errands and then it was back home to clean the house. I don't know why I do it but when I feel good I want to do everything in one day and then I completely overdue it. Around dinner I started cramping, had lower back pain and I had to stop everything. It was pretty much a take it easy night. Paul had to go to work and the kids and I just curled up watching a movie and went to bed early. I was so thankful that everyone slept through the night and I was able to get a good night sleep.

Thursday I woke up feeling better but still like I pulled a muscle in my back. Weird feeling. My parents drove in today for the holiday and we spent a quiet evening at home. Everyone was excited because tomorrow is the big ultrasound. As much as I am excited, there's a piece of me that's a bit concerned. I felt the same with Morgan and Shane's ultrasound. Just a bit nervous that the technician is going to find something wrong with the baby. Why do we (meaning expecting Moms) put ourselves through this?

I woke up early on Friday and started to get everyone organized. We had to be at the hospital by 9:00 a.m. and I wanted to be early because I wasn't exactly sure where we were going. Paul met us at the hospital, we all went in for the ultrasound and it was wonderful! Everyone was watching the screen trying to figure out what the baby was. It was such an amazing moment watching everyone's faces. This was the first time that my Dad had ever seen an ultrasound and it was funny because he didn't even blink as he watched the screen. Half way through the ultrasound I started to laugh and said, "Did you see that?" My Mom laughed and said, "I did, I did!" Paul and Dad were clueless. The kids kept asking, "See what Mommy, Mama, what"? The baby measured perfect and everything was perfect. We had initially told the technician to tell Paul or I what the gender was (if she could tell) because we wanted to tell my parents and the kids. The technician whispered in Paul's ear and he smiled and shook his head. I laughed and said, "Another little Shaney?" Paul smiled and shook his head yes. We were a bit nervous to tell Morgan because she wanted a sister really bad. That's all she talked about. She came over to me as I lay on the table and asked if Ms. Sue (the technician) knew what the baby was a boy or a girl. I held my breath for a second and leaned over and whispered that we would be having some special "girl time" together. She looked at me and smiled and whispered, "It's a BOY!" She quietly asked if she could tell my parents. I smiled and said, "Yes". I thought she was going to yell "It's a BOY" but, instead, she ran over to my Mom and quietly whispered in her ear, "It's a boy" and gave my Mom a great big hug. She then proceeded to run over to my Dad and do the same thing. She asked if we (Paul or I) wanted to tell Shane or if she could. Paul and I smiled and told her to go ahead. Morgan walked over to Shane and whispered in his ear, "Shaney, the baby is a BOY!" It was precious because Shane spun around quickly and had this amazing look on his face and he started jumping up and down with excitement. It was wonderful moment. The doctor came into the room and went over everything with us. He said that the baby looked great and everything measured perfectly. It was the next part that stopped Paul and I in our tracks. The doctor proceeded to tell us that the baby has a two-vessel umbilical cord instead of a three vessel. We then reviewed all sides of the possibilities (positive and negative). Honestly, it was a lot to take in all at once. I think that some of the shock and nervousness came from trying to digest all of the information. Paul and I talked and decided that we would just take it as it came but, I know myself, and there will be good days and days that I'm nervous and/or a bit scared. I think any expectant Mom would be. It's only natural.

Saturday brought Christmas Eve and we went shopping for last minute things and the kids went to see Santa again and Shane finally sat on Santa's lap. It was precious. Both kids told Santa to have a wonderful Christmas with Mrs. Claus and they gave him a great big hug. My brother, Kenn and his wife, Karen, arrived in the early evening. It was a really nice evening with the exception that everyone kept asking Morgan is she was okay because she wanted a sister so bad. It really became a bit annoying and after some words were exchanged with the adults, Morgan told me that yes she wanted a sister but was really excited. The only thing that was bothering her was that everyone kept asking her about how she was feeling. I put my foot down and told everyone to leave poor Morgan alone. She was fine.

The kids were up by 6:00 a.m. and ready to open up the gifts. It was funny because Kenn wants a child someday but when things don't go "on schedule" it throws him off a bit. I can't wait for the day to see him with his own children. I told him that kids don't come with on/off switches and he just looked at me a bit confused as my parents, Paul and I laughed as if we were telling a private joke. He'll see someday. Christmas was wonderful! The kids were so excited about all of their gifts. Morgan about fell over when she opened up her American Girl Today Doll. Shane started jumping up and down when he opened up his Woody doll and especially his Herbie Pull Back Car. They are so precious and so appreciative of all of their gifts. Paul had to leave for work around 9:00 a.m. and returned at 6:00 p.m. We had a wonderful dinner and evening together. It was nice and quiet. It was especially wonderful that Paul was with us again. Do you know what else was fantastic about the day? I was able to eat anything and everything. I think I ate enough for two people, maybe three! Kenn learned another lesson on Christmas. Something was mentioned about our baby's gender and Kenn started to talk to Morgan about it. She looked at him and asked, "Didn't my Mommy tell you that I was fine with the baby's gender?" He said, "Yes she did". Morgan then told him, "Yes, I really wanted a sister but as long as the baby is healthy, that's all that truly matters Uncle Kenny. I'm five and I get that…how old are you?" Well, let's just say that it was interesting to see a five year old put a thirty-five year old in his place. He just smiled nervously and told her she was right. I was glad to see that she stood up for herself and didn't let his words bother her. I mean, she is only five and shouldn't have to deal with all of the badgering questions about the gender.

Monday night was special. We went to Dutch Wonderland Christmas and it was great! The kids had a fantastic time riding everything. The hard part for me was that I couldn't ride hardly anything and I love riding things with the kids. This time I had to sit and watch Paul, Kenn and Karen ride with them. I loved seeing their smiling faces but I really missed being the one who took them on all of the rides. I can't wait until this summer when we can go back and ride everything again. Morgan's big enough to ride the roller coaster and I want to be the first person to take her on the coaster. It'll be a blast!

We had our first "girls day" with Mom, Karen, Morgan and me. We went out for breakfast at a local Mom and Pop place. It was supposed to be about Morgan but the conversation kept going back to Karen and everything she's going through. I tried to politely change the topic four or five times but with no oval. Morgan was heart broken and was quite upset with everyone. Who could blame her? This was supposed to be about her, not Karen. I just don't understand why Karen doesn't get that sometimes. She's such a wonderful person but sometimes she think that the world revolves around her. I had to talk a couple of times with Morgan. Kenn and Karen left in the early afternoon. After they left, all of us went shopping. Shane ended up sleeping about five minutes after we left and Paul said he'd sit with in the van. When we arrived at Rockvale Shopping Center Morgan refused to get out of the van. She was still upset and didn't want to shop. Now let me tell you, Morgan loves to shop and there was only one other time she didn't want to shop she was sick so I knew that this was serious. I talked to her and she was upset with my Mom and Karen. I told her that she could stay with her Daddy or go in with Mama, Pappy, and me. She chose to stay with her Daddy. I talked with my Mom as to why she wouldn't get out of the van and she agreed to talk with Morgan as soon possible. Mom went back to the van with me to talk to Morgan and when we got to the van, Morgan was sleeping. A few hours later, Morgan and Shane were both up again and we headed out to the Build-A-Bear place at the local mall. They were really excited to pick out what bear they wanted and what they would dress them in. Morgan was still a bit off with my Mom but I just let things go figuring that they would work it out in their own time.

Wednesday Paul went to work in the early morning and Dad helped me do a few things around the house that involved lifting. That's one of the hardest things about being pregnant. The restrictions. I'm used to doing everything by myself and it's hard to have to "ask" for help. Dad was really great. He knew how hard it is for me and was just so sweet. Dad and I ran down the street to get a forty-four pound of dog food. During that time, Morgan finally talked with my Mom they talked about how "girls day" will be from now on. Morgan seems a lot better now that she's talked with Mom. Now, at some point, Morgan will talk with Aunt Karen and I'm not sure how that will go. Hopefully well. My parents left in the afternoon and I took the kids out immediately to run errands and keep them busy for a bit. We returned home, made dinner and Paul came home from work and we spent a nice, quiet evening together.

The rest of the week was pretty much trying to clean up the house from the holidays and making sure that I'm drinking enough water. In all of the craziness from the holidays, I sure ate enough but I wasn't drinking water at least eight glasses a day so I'll have to work on that. Time now to settle back down into it just being the four of us and our little baby boy. How cool is that?!?! We now know that we are having a little boy. Now comes the hard part…picking out a name. I'll keep you posted on that one (it usually takes Paul and I some time before we agree on anything). Happy holiday to everyone!

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