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Susan's Pregnancy After Loss Journal

Week 15 ~ September 23, 2005
~ Dealing With Work, Traffic and Stress

The trip to DC went well. I felt ok most of the time, except when my husband's car overheated after he picked me up from the airport, and we had to drive in 90+ degree weather with the heat on. Luckily the beautiful hotel room had a giant hot tub that I filled up with cool water and took a nice refreshing soak! We did some sightseeing and ate some nice meals and had a generally relaxing time. The flight back was jam packed and miserable though. I was wedged in the middle seat with nowhere to rest my arms and I felt like I was going to throw up the whole time. But I guess the trip was worth it overall.

It's been a pretty uneventful week. The nausea is still with me all day, taking an hour off here and there, but I can't even describe how thankful for those hours. My list of known nausea triggers grows all the time. So far we have stress, hunger, heat, fried foods, too much sugar, not enough sleep, and too much physical activity. I am trying to work 7:30 - 4:30 (I work in advertising) to avoid the major traffic stress; since I commute 50 miles a day, traffic stress is a biggie. I don't think my bosses are happy about it but they haven't said anything. I didn't ask them; I have just been doing it every day for a couple months now. With my last pregnancy, I asked if I could adjust my hours and they said no. We work 8:30 - 5:30 and do not offer flex hours, part time or telecommuting. So I pushed myself very hard and the price I paid was too high. I am not saying that the stress of traffic and work made me lose my daughter but I am saying that I did it their way last time and ended up in the hospital three times before I delivered and the doctor said that stress and the viruses and colds being passed around in a germy office environment were definitely contributing factors for those incidents. So along with adjusting my hours, I also plan to go home if someone in my area decides to come to work with cold or flu symptoms. My hand washing at work has also become quite rigorous.

I still haven't gained any weight, but I definitely have a pregnant looking tummy. Actually I had a somewhat pregnant looking tummy to begin with since I only delivered 3 months before I got pregnant again, but it is more so now. I didn't gain any weight until 6 months with the last one but definitely looked pregnant by 13 weeks, don't know how that works. Probably a combination of the nausea and absence of weekend cocktails aiding in shedding pounds everywhere else but my growing stomach. As long as I am not losing any weight we should be ok.

It feels like forever since my last doctor appointment on September 1. I go to my OB on September 29th and then I will alternate going to the OB and high risk perinatologist at the hospital every two weeks. At least I hope it works out that way. I have my perinatal hospital appointment on October 14 and I am hoping he says come in once a month and not every 6 weeks. I am particularly anxious because we have not been able to find the baby's heartbeat with our doppler for over a month and the doctor couldn't find it at the last appointment with her doppler either so she had to do an ultrasound. I know it is still early and everyone says not to worry because the baby can still hide at this stage, but it is very difficult not to.

Until next time, hope everyone has a pleasant week and WELCOME FALL!!

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