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Susan's Pregnancy After Loss Journal

Week 8
~ Our First REAL OB Appointment

I've been to the doctor three times already, twice for blood tests and once for the freak-out after the rafting trip. This week, however was our first scheduled exam. We got to see the baby again. He/she has grown a lot in 10 days and the heartbeat was very strong. We just sat there and looked and looked for a very long time. Luckily our doctor is very accommodating. I wish there were some kind of monitor I could wear all the time to let me know the baby is ok.

We scheduled the Nuchal Translucency tests and discussed CVS and Amnio and decided to get the results from the NT scan before deciding on anything more invasive. I know the risk of miscarriage is only .2%-1% depending on which test you do, but when you have been that less than 1% statistic, those numbers don't sound so low. Hopefully the NT scan will give us the peace of mind we are looking for and we won't have to do either.

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Well, the nausea is still here all day every day. Nothing helps. Every kind of food and beverage repulses me. All I can stand is ice cold water. I force feed myself raisin toast in the morning and crackers for a snack and anything I can stand the sight of for lunch and dinner. I've had eggs and grits for dinner several times and Corn Pops or Grapenuts a few other times. My husband thinks I am so silly eating breakfast foods for dinner all the time, but he only made the mistake of mentioning how amusing it is once.

Chris has been acting pretty strangely, almost like nothing is happening and this really irritated me. I thought he would go overboard babying me when we got pregnant again, but that isn't happening, so I pushed and pushed until he finally said, "I am terrified something will happen, ok!" Guess I am so used to him being the eternal optimist that it never occurred to me that he might be scared too. I still want to be babied though. Hopefully he will get on board with that plan soon.

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