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Tamira's pregnancy journal

Week 15 - May 4, 2006
~ Vivid Dreams

Whoever knew that dreams could affect you so much? For instance, since we found out that I was pregnant, there has been no doubt in my mind that this baby is a boy. It has never once crossed mine or my husband’s minds that it could possibly be a girl. We already have a boy’s name picked out and have been calling “him” by it since the beginning. Well, a couple of weeks ago, I had a dream that changed everything. I dreamed that the doctor wanted to go ahead and take the baby out for a few days (I know – crazy) and do some work on my uterus, and then put it back in to finish growing. Well, when they took the baby out, I looked at it and low and behold, it was a tiny baby girl. I said, “Oh no. It’s a girl. We don’t even have a name!” Well, from there the dream just got stranger; however, when I woke up the next morning, I was no longer convinced that we were having a boy. I have absolutely no idea what this baby will be, no instinct, no nothing. We have even come up with a lovely girl name.

Now, the dream that has affected me the most happened Friday night. It was a short dream, but very vivid. Evidently, Gary and I had been keeping a young foster girl for a little while in our home. However, I had forgotten that we were keeping her until someone asked where she was. I immediately panicked as I had not seen her in 2 days. I was so panicked that I literally woke up in fear. I immediately jumped out of bed and burst out of the bedroom. I ran to the living room where my husband was peacefully watching television. I was on my way to the front door to go look for the girl when Gary grabbed me by the arms and was like, “Tamira! Wake up!” I then informed him that I was not asleep and that we had to find the girl. Of course, he had no clue as to what I was talking about and told me that there was no girl. After several minutes of debating the reality of the girl, I went back to bed very confused. I have never felt an emotion so strongly in a dream before. If Gary hadn’t been there watching T.V. I probably would have been down the street before I realized what was going on. Pretty scary, and hard to explain to the neighbors.

Now, about these backaches. I have been having occasional backaches for the last week or two, but I have just contributed them to the worn out chair that I am forced to sit in at work all day. But this week I am at a whole new level of pain. You see, on Saturday, I decided that it was high time for me to get to work in my flower gardens. I have been thinking about it for weeks, but have not mustered up the energy. So, I decided to start in my shade garden. I had bought several new additions last weekend, but was too tired to plant them, so I started there. I was only able to work out there for about an hour before I was totally exhausted. I was able to take a nap since the girls were with my mom, but when I woke up I could barely move. You would think that I had spent the whole day outside. Well, I only suffered with the soreness for a day or two, but now I just have this dull ache in the lower part of my back on the right hand side. It won’t go away. I am sleeping with the pillow between my legs like is suggested for pregnant women, and I am even keeping my feet elevated on a large book at work. If anyone has any suggestions, I would love to hear from you. I didn’t experience this kind of back pain with either of my girls until at least the 8th and 9th month.

Tiny Flutters - You’d think that I would know for sure if I am feeling the baby move being that this is my 3rd child. However, I am just not sure. With Brooke and Rachel I was sure, especially with Rachel. It felt like tiny muscle spasms in my tummy. But with this one, I keep having the sensation that there is a small ball rolling around in my stomach. I am pretty sure that I am feeling the baby; it is just such a different feeling. I can’t wait to meet this little bundle!

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