I wish I had better tidings or a better title for this entry, but I'm honestly just trying to hang on to my self-esteem, and to some degree, my confidence as well.
Those of you who have read my entries from last year will know that 2013 was a crappy year, with a lot of instability and uncertainty. I honestly thought 2014 would be different. Turns out, it was, at least initially.
In August of this year, I was (once again) let go from my employer at a local hospice agency, even though I had done nothing wrong, but just the same, I was let go. Fast forward to today, and I am once again in this mess, after (surprisingly) being hired in late August as a director of admissions for a local nursing home. I gave both jobs my all and did, in my heart, the very best I could. These so-called "employers" felt otherwise.
Now, I'm back at square one.
I am working right now on a local campaign to help oust a lawmaker who has honestly been in the job for far too long and is not doing enough to help his constituents. The woman I am supporting is the complete antithesis. It's nice to be part of an effort to help people and to make a difference. In all honesty, that's what truly motivates me.
I am hoping that this latest bump in the road is a short one. I really don't know how much more of this I can take. Once or twice to be let go from a job is one thing, but this rollercoaster has to stop. I am beyond nauseated and my family - and I - deserve better.
My daughter is in her senior year of high school, and I'd like to enjoy it, without wondering whether or not the ax is going to come back down on me again. I can't understand why this keeps happening. Neither can my husband. While I don't feel he outright believes I am sabotaging myself, there are some days I wonder if he truly does think that. In my heart of hearts, I have done nothing wrong. I only want to work hard and help support my family, including helping my daughter through college. I honestly don't think that's too much to ask.
Again, I wish I had some better words of wisdom to impart or something positive to add, but I'm drawing a blank right now. I want this particular journey to end. Now. I need and deserve better.