Tara's Working Mom's Journal Journal

Entry 20 - April 21, 2009
~ No, I Haven't Dropped Off the Face of The Earth

Cassie and Cam . . . but I tell you, some days, it feels like I'm on another planet!

Things are moving along here; the grass is getting greener, the weather is beginning to be a bit warmer, and my babies continue to grow. Cassie doesn't like my calling her my "baby," but I hope one day she'll understand that no matter how old your kids get, they'll always be your "babies."

Cassie is doing well on all fronts, thank the Lord . . . it's hard to believe that she's almost done with sixth grade! She's still playing violin and will need to get a new size by next year. She finished up swimming lessons back in March, and in the interim, we plan on getting some yoga and meditation classes together. I figured it can help us both relax and learn to handle any stress - I can remember when I was her age and getting stressed about things, and I want to give her some healthy ways to deal with it (and learn a few more of those techniques myself!).

Cam is doing well . . . talking up a storm and just cracking us all up! While he has his "toddler" moments (and more time-outs than I care to recall), he's very sweet and just loves his sister. He reminds me so much of Cassie at that age. The picture I've attached from Easter is a perfect example. Of course, Cassie didn't smile in that picture, but trust me when I say they do favor each other in a big way!

Bill and I are doing OK. He thought my last entry was a little of a "downer," but since that time, I am feeling better. The challenges that have been thrown our family's way haven't gone away completely, but we're making some positive progress. I really feel God's presence. There was a time, a few weeks ago, that I felt kind of abandoned by God, that he wasn't listening to my pleas for peace . . . for my family and me. Since that time, I have felt a calmness and a bit of peace of mind. I have to keep reminding myself to "give my worries" up to God. That's tough to do. I'm a very "take charge and get it done" sort of person, so giving up control (or perceived control) that I think I have has been challenging, but I'm getting better at it.

This time a year ago, I was starting a new adventure in my career . . . and I've survived! There was a time where I couldn't imagine leaving radio, because I had put so much of myself into it and I really felt like I was making a difference. But now, I feel I'm making more of an impact and I'm using my background and knowledge to help other people. One of the perks of my job is when I get to talk with people who need assistance, whether it's about preventing identity theft, to how they can get information on victims' compensation, or how to apply for a grant for a program to keep kids out of trouble. While there are some challenges (what job doesn't have them?), all in all I think it was a pretty good move for me.

Bill and I just feel very lucky to be able to provide for our family. This economic downturn hit his company a few months back (he was spared, thank God), and there was some talk of furloughs and/or layoffs with the state (my "employer"). I'm just thankful that we can go to work each day, and I pray that we can continue to do so.

Well, it's about time to call it quits for the day. Sometimes, it seems like there just aren't enough hours in the day. Take care, everyone, and here's hoping you all have a nice spring! Couldn't come soon enough, I say!


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